Galactic Abductions Inc. is the leading interstellar agency for abduction and transport, with a purely academic purpose. We focus on delivering Earth specimens to clients in distant galaxies across the universe, providing a safe, precise, and reliable service.
Although our initial shipments faced setbacks (we all started as beginners), each mistake taught us lessons that now allow us to operate under strict protocols and intergalactic efficiency.
While our primary focus is on humans, we also work with other terrestrial creatures.
What is Galactic Abductions Inc.?
Our mission is to deliver specimens from Earth to civilizations across the universe with a 100% success rate, regardless of distance or cosmic variables, utilizing wormholes and soon incorporating time travel.
MISSION
Founded in a galaxy far, far away by a group of ambitious aliens, Galactic Abductions Inc. was born out of a clear need: to centralize and professionalize the extraction of Earth specimens. Before its creation, abductions were handled by individuals and small groups, leading to constant errors: evidence left behind, uncontrolled encounters, and records interpreted by terrestrial civilizations as ancient “UFO sightings.” Even inexperienced pilots caused incidents on Earth, such as the famous Roswell crash in 1947.
By consolidating operations, Galactic Abductions Inc. established strict protocols and secure routes, ensuring that every extraction is undetectable and efficient. Since then, the company has perfected its methods: each abduction follows intergalactic standards of discretion and care, ensuring no trace is left for Earth authorities and that the specimens, after fulfilling our clients’ purposes, are safely returned to their homes.
What began as a small, experimental service has now become the leading abduction agency, capable of delivering specimens to any civilization in the universe with absolute precision. We combine wormhole technology with early advances in time travel to guarantee immediate and risk-free deliveries. You no longer need to travel thousands of light-years: leave the cumbersome work to us and just place your order. Fast, safe, and simple!
Our History
Customer Reviews
—We needed a human being who had never been abducted and never would be. Somehow, in a way we still don't understand or can't describe, they resolved the paradox.
— Temporal Ethics Committee (Unofficial)
★★★★★
—Previous contractors left cave paintings.
GAI left nothing.
— Historical Damage Control Division
★★★★★
—Specimen delivered, studied, returned, and emotionally intact.
Disappointing. Excellent work.
— Advanced Consciousness Research Laboratory
★★★★★
—We appreciate their strict data protection policies.
Not even our own archivists know what we requested.
— Anonymous Client, Western Spiral Arm
★★★★★
—Several cycles ago, I received a human. I assumed it was a mistake: I hadn't placed any order. However, the shipment included a note: "I know you need this. —Your future love." At the time, I considered contacting Galactic Abductions Inc. using the souvenir that came with the human. However, the company didn't exist yet. Now, after many years, I tried to register the request again. I was informed that the order was never placed. I've stopped trying to find love, thinking that since I already have someone who loves me, I just need to know who they are and relive our love story. However, that thought backfired. How can I contact my former future love?
— Anonymous Client
★★★★★
—GAI claims to bring other creatures from Earth besides humans. Upon reviewing their rules, we discovered they don't specify that "such creature must exist." We decided to exploit this oversight.
Intending to file a formal complaint for breach of consumer service, we requested the abduction of a dragon.
We assumed the loophole would work in our favor. However, the specimen was delivered.
The shipment included a single note: "No questions asked."
From that moment on, we began to suspect that Galactic Abductions Inc. possesses far more advanced technology than they publicly admit.
— Intergalactic Commercial Regulation Board
★★★★★
Frequently Asked Questions
How to Place an Order?
Don’t worry. You don’t need to.
The moment you even consider it, the process has already begun.
Just make sure you have enough intergalactic funds.
We take care of the rest.
No forms required. No unnecessary questions. No explanations needed.
We know every detail of your need:
the what, the when, the where… and the why, even if you don’t yet.
Our systems identify the right specimen before you make a conscious decision.
The abduction is executed.
The delivery is completed.
If you’re reading this, it means you were already eligible.
Galactic Abductions Inc.
You think it.
We make it happen.
That is… not a question you are meant to answer.
Our operations span beyond what you consider space.
Coordinates are irrelevant. Light-years are meaningless.
Know this: seeking our location too eagerly can be… unwise.
Curiosity has consequences. Some doors, once opened, cannot be closed.
We exist where we are needed,
and nowhere else.
Galactic Abductions Inc.
You are safe… as long as you follow instructions
Where Is Galactic Abductions Inc.?
Is it possible to acquire the exclusive abduction of a specimen?
Yes. All abductions carried out by Galactic Abductions Inc. include a default security and exclusivity protocol.
When an abduction is contracted, both the client and the specimen receive a souvenir. For the client, it serves as tangible confirmation of the service. For the specimen, it acts as a cognitive marker that prevents future abductions by third parties. Through subtle memory adjustments, the souvenir replaces fragmented memories of the event with a harmless narrative—often interpreted as a gift or a purchase—ensuring discretion and psychological stability.
Each specimen is intended to be abducted only once, preventing permanent damage or severe alterations. If the original client wishes to abduct the same specimen again, this must be explicitly requested. However, Galactic Abductions Inc. reserves the right to evaluate such requests. Using advanced protocols and automated analysis of intentions and objectives, we determine whether a second abduction is safe and compatible with the specimen’s integrity and intergalactic regulations.
In this way, souvenirs serve a dual purpose: they preserve the specimen’s safety while ensuring exclusivity and control for the client, preventing conflicts with other contractors or the abduction network.
Can I choose the souvenir?
Yes. Galactic Abductions Inc. allows clients to select the type of souvenir associated with the abduction, provided it complies with cognitive safety protocols and non-interference standards for Earth.
Souvenirs are not simple keepsakes. Each one fulfills a specific function within the specimen protection process:
reinforcing the cognitive marker that prevents unauthorized abductions,
stabilizing post-event memories,
and reducing the likelihood that the specimen interprets the experience as real or traumatic.
From the specimen’s perspective, the souvenir typically manifests as a voluntarily acquired object, a meaningful gift, or a “special” item with no clear origin. Internal memory logic adjusts automatically to avoid contradictions.
From the client’s perspective, the souvenir acts as symbolic proof of the service, without compromising order confidentiality or the specimen’s integrity.
Please note that not all souvenirs are available for every specimen. Our system evaluates factors such as mental stability, social environment, curiosity level, and likelihood of suspicion. In certain cases, Galactic Abductions Inc. will assign an alternative souvenir if the selected one poses unnecessary risk.
These are some of our available souvenirs:
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